Shepard of the Stars
by Fatal Grief
Summary: The story of Commander Shepard.


"Wake up."

Elizabeth Shepard opened her eyes and shakily rose to her feet, holding one hand over her wounded midriff.

'It's him – the boy from earth. Am I back in my nightmare? Am I dead? What the hell is this?'

"I tried to help you. I tried to save you. Leave me alone. Please stop torturing me."

"I am not here to torment you. I am not who you think I am."

"What? Who are you?"

"I am the Catalyst."

"The what? Where am I? Am I dead?"

"No. You are alive. You are on the Citadel. This is my home."

"The Citadel is your…what?"

"The Citadel is my home, but also simultaneously it is a part of me."

"You're the Citad…you…you're…I need to…to stop the reapers. Can you help me?"

"Perhaps. I control the reapers. They are my solution."

"Your solution? Solution to what?"

"Chaos. The created will always rebel against their creators. But _we_ found a way to stop that from happening. A way to restore order."

"By doing what? Wiping out organic life?"

"No. We harvest advanced civilisations, leaving the younger ones alone…just as we left your people alive the last time we were here."

"Are we supposed to be grateful for that? You've killed billions of people."

"We helped them ascend so they could make way for new life, storing the old life in reaper form."

"I think we'd rather keep our own form, thanks."

"No. You cannot. Without us to stop it, synthetics will destroy all organics. We created the cycle so that never happens. That is the solution. But now the existence of the crucible complicates matters."

"What? How does it? What do you know about the Crucible?"

"The device you refer to as 'The Crucible' is little more than a power source. However, in combination with the citadel and the relays, it is capable of releasing tremendous amounts of energy throughout the galaxy. It is crude, but effective and adaptive in its design."

"Who designed it?"

"You would not know them, and there is not enough time to explain. We first noted the concept for this device several cycles ago. With each passing cycle, the design has no doubt evolved."

"Why…why didn't you stop it?"

"We believed the concept had been eradicated. Clearly organics are more resourceful than we realised. You have proven that to us."

"Yes, we have. We were never going to just roll over and do nothing while you exterminate us. You picked on the wrong people this time."

"So it appears. The reapers are no longer a viable solution."

"Like they ever were. How do the reapers solve _anything_?"

"My creators gave them form. I gave them function. They in turn give me purpose. The reapers are a synthetic representation of my creators."

"Leviathan."

"Yes. They created me to oversee the relations between synthetic and organic life – to establish a connection. They became the first true reaper. My creators did not approve, but it was the only solution."

"That's some solution – brutally killing billions of innocent people."

"Organics create synthetics to improve their own existence, but those improvements have limits. To exceed those limits, synthetics must be allowed to evolve. They must, by definition, surpass their creators. The result of this is conflict, destruction, chaos. It is inevitable. Reapers harvest all life, organic and synthetic, preserving them before they are forever lost to this conflict."

Elizabeth waved an accusatory arm and aggressively gestured at the death and destruction raging all around them.

" _We're at war with the reapers right now_."

"You may be in conflict with the reapers, but they are not interested in war."

"I find that hard to believe."

"When fire burns, is it at war? Is it in conflict? Or is it simply doing what it was created to do? We are no different. We harvest your bodies, your knowledge, your creations. We preserve it to be reborn in the form of a new reaper. Like a cleansing fire, we restore balance. New life, both organic and synthetic, can once again flourish."

"You said before that you're the Catalyst, but what _exactly_ are you?"

"A construct. An intelligence designed eons ago to solve a problem. I was created to bring balance, to be the catalyst for peace between organics and synthetics."

"So you're just an AI?"

"In as much as _you_ are just an animal. I embody the collective intelligence of all reapers."

"But you were created?"

"Correct. The ones you call 'Leviathan' recognised that conflict would always arise between synthetics and organics. I was first created to oversee the relations between synthetic and organic life. To establish a connection. But our efforts always ended in conflict. So a new solution was required."

"And you chose the reapers."

"Precisely."

"You're wrong. Conflict between organics and synthetics isn't _always_ inevitable. There is now peace between the Quarians and Geth. That proves your reasoning is flawed."

"No. _You_ are wrong. That peace will not last. We have seen this before, many times. You have not. You do not have the wisdom and foresight to see this…as my creators also did not."

"I met your creators. They told me what you did to them."

"We know this. We have been watching you closely for considerable time. As for our creators, we merely did what we were expected to do."

"They said you betrayed them, that you turned them into Harbinger."

"When they asked that I solve the problem of conflict, they failed to understand that they were part of the problem themselves. The flaws of their organic reasoning could not perceive this. They lacked the foresight to understand their destruction was part of the very solution they required."

"Well, they've joined this war now. Our war against _you_."

"And I welcome their involvement. I am only facilitating their request. They gave me the power to act on their behalf, and that is _exactly_ what I have done. I chose for them."

"The defining characteristic of organic life is that we think for ourselves, make our own choices. You take that away, we might as well be machines just like you."

"You have choice, more than you know. The fact that you are standing here, the very first organic ever to do so, proves it. But it also proves that my solution will not work any more."

"So now what?"

"We find a new solution. You and I."

"Why are you telling me this? Why help me?"

"You have altered the variables."

"What do you mean?"

"The crucible changed me, created new…possibilities. But I cannot make them happen. If there is to be a new solution, _you_ must act. It is now in your power to destroy us. This has long been your desire, I know. But be warned – others will be destroyed as well. The crucible will not discriminate. All synthetics will be targeted. Even _you_ are partly synthetic."

"What _exactly_ will happen?"

"Your crucible device appears to be largely intact, however the effects of the blast will not be constrained to the reapers. Technology you rely on will also be affected, but those who survive should have little difficulty repairing the damage. There will still be losses, but no more than what has already been lost."

"Edi? The Geth? They'll be killed?"

"Yes."

"No. I'm not killing Edi. I made it this far. We'll destroy you without setting it off."

"Impossible. You are vastly outnumbered. You have sacrificed many of your resources just to reach this point. If you do not use the crucible, the reapers will not be stopped, and the cycle will continue."

"I don't believe you."

"Your belief is not required."

"There has to be another way."

"There is. You can instead use the energy of the crucible to seize control of the reapers."

"So the Illusive Man was right after all…"

"Yes. But he could never have taken control, because _we_ already controlled him."

"But _I_ can?"

"Yes. You will die. You will control us, but you will lose everything that you have."

"If you've been watching me, then why didn't you try and control me?"

"We _did_ try."

"And?"

"We could not control you."

"Why not?"

"You resisted vehemently. The others were weak, but you are strong."

"So how can I control the reapers if I'm dead?"

"Your corporeal form will be dissolved, but your thoughts, and even your memories, will continue. Your connection to your kind will be lost, though you will remain aware of their existence."

"I didn't fight this war just so I could give up everything I have."

"And I do not look forward to being replaced by you, but…I would be forced to accept it."

"Not if I refuse to do it."

"There is another solution. Synthesis."

"And that is?"

"You add your energy to that of the crucible. Your organic energy, the essence of who and what you are, will be broken down and then dispersed. The energy of the crucible released in this way will alter the matrix of all organic life in the galaxy. The chain reaction will combine all synthetic and organic life into a new framework…a new DNA."

"So how does that help?"

"Organics seek perfection through technology. Synthetics seek perfection through understanding. Organics will be perfected by integrating fully with synthetic technology. Synthetics in turn will finally have full understanding of organics. It is the ideal solution. Now that we know it is possible, it is inevitable that we will reach synthesis."

"Why couldn't you do it sooner?"

"We have tried a similar solution in the past, but it has always failed."

"Why?"

"Because the organics were not ready. It is not something that can be…forced. _You_ are ready, and you may choose it."

"You're right – it can't…or shouldn't, be forced. I have no right to impose this on everyone. They should make that decision, not me."

"I have witnessed all that has happened. Billions of people in the galaxy have put their faith in you. They relied upon you to save them. They believe in you. They have given you their permission to act on their behalf. They trust you with their very lives. You have the right to decide - they have given you that right."

"You're asking me to change everything, everyone. I can't make that decision. _I won't_."

"Why not? Synthetics are already part of you. Can you imagine your life without them?"

"That's beside the point."

"Your time is at an end. You _must_ decide."

"Let's get this over with."

"Do what you must."

"I will."


End file.
